St. Patrick’s Day in Newport is finally here!!! And since the weather is going to be nice, we can expect Newport to be more crowded than ever. That considered, I’ve decided to give you a bit of a cheat sheet to help things go smoothly.

First of all, if you’re not from Newport, you’re going to need a place to stay and there is no better hotel in all of Newport than Gurney’s Newport Resort and Marina. If you haven’t been there to see the renovations, then you’re going to be blown away. Gurney’s is the nicest hotel Newport without question and it’s a five minute walk to the parade route so BOOK YOUR ROOM NOW!

gurneys newport

Second, you need to know that Newport Craft’s Amber Ale is the official beer of the Newport St. Patrick’s Day parade and you should support them by drinking their Amber Ale all weekend long!

📸 @j_david_bennett

Next, you’re going to need some green to wear so head to Deborah Winthrop Lingerie at Clock Tower Square in Portsmouth for all of your green Hanky Panky, bras and lingerie needs!

Deborah Winthrop Lingerie

It’s a marathon not a sprint!

This is important and it can’t be stressed enough. St. Patrick’s Day in Newport is marathon and not a sprint. If you choose not to follow this simple advice, then you’re on your own. Best case scenario is that you just pass out somewhere. Worst case? Well there’s a reason that the Monday after St. Patrick’s Day Newport Daily News is the most highly anticipated edition of the year and the Police and Fire section is always chock full of idiotic tales.

There are a few simple rules that will keep you out of jail on St. Patrick’s Day.

  1. DO NOT pee in public. That will get you every time.
  2. Don’t fight. That will do it too.
  3. Don’t drink alcohol in public especially if you’re acting like an asshole. If you’re of age, you probably won’t end up in jail but you’ll end up with a HUGE fine.
  4. Don’t drive drunk. Duh!

 

If for some reason you find yourself on the wrong side of the law, then call Attorney Kevin Hagan at (401) 487-8691. He’s the best around and will get you the best result.

 

But remember, use a toilet, please!

via GIPHY

 

Navigating your day!

So here’s the deal. The parade starts at 11am at City Hall on Broadway, winds through downtown and finishes up at St. Augustin’s Church in Newport’s old 5th Ward.

Now you’re going to NEED to eat before you start your day and I have two perfect choices for you.

Tavern on Broadway is smack dab in the heat of the parade route. They start serving Irish Breakfast at 8am and believe me they will be PACKED so get there early!

And the great thing about Tavern is that it’s just across the street from Fastnet and they’re always slammed as well.

If you’re watching the parade in the middle of Newport, then you’re going to want to hit up Liberty Donuts on Long Wharf Mall for great breakfast sandwiches, the freshest donuts and amazing coffee!

 

Again. St. Patrick’s Day in Newport is not a sprint so order extra food, get your base and fuel up!

Who has the best live music?

Finding fun on St. Patrick’s Day in Newport is easy but knowing where the best parties are and where the best crowds will be takes a bit of experience. So here’s the schedule.

Once you’ve finished breakfast, get yourself to Tavern on Broadway and claim your real estate!

  • The O’Tooles are playing at 1pm and they have a special food menu all day with corned beef sandwiches! (crowd is a good mix of locals and tourists 21+)

 

If you’d like to adventure in town a bit, then your next stop is the Newport Blues Cafe!

Starting at 11am and going all day and night, the Newport Blues Cafe has Felix Brown, Dirty Deeds AC/DC Experience, Fast Times 80’s Music and Darik & the Funbags! (crowd skews Boston 25 – 50)

Newport Blues Cafe

If you’re feeling a bit adventurous and want to hit up Newport’s biggest and craziest St. Patrick’s Day party, then head down Thames Street to Waites Wharf and go to Dockside and The Deck!

They open at 10am and will have music all day and night from Never in Vegas, 7 Day Weekend, DJ FACE, DJ 4 Hundo, and DJ TEAL. (younger crowd but you’ll find plenty of people from 21 – 46)

Dockside St. Patrick's

If you’re looking for a spot on Bellevue, head up to La Forge. They have Dave Manuel on piano and a killer Irish menu all weekend!

La Forge St. Patrick's menu

 

Parlor has The Ravers at 2pm.

the ravers newport ri

 

What else?

Are there other options? Sure but these are the best and guaranteed to have great crowds and great live music!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day, Newport, RI

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